Family & wellbeing
Getting your parents to a hospital visit, graduation, wedding, or family gathering can take more planning than the event itself. Traffic, delayed flights, and inadequate support equipment are common obstacles to smooth transit. A clear transportation plan protects your parents’ comfort and independence while making the day easier for everyone. Try to find ways to support your parents that don’t make them feel old, particularly by highlighting the benefits the rest of the family gets from the accommodations you get for your parents.
A practical path forward
Ask your parents about their recent travel, including what problems they encountered.
Make a primary plan and a backup, then share them with everyone involved.
Call destinations to confirm accessibility and any reservation requirements for support aids.
Your parents’ transportation needs may be greater than their younger selves due to both physical changes and mental decline. They may do fine in familiar surroundings, but their capabilities will be less when traveling than when they are at home. This may catch them by surprise, as their continued abilities at home trick them into thinking they’ll have the same capabilities in all aspects of life.
Medical rides have extra handoffs that your parents may not anticipate. You may be able to use the excuse of a medical visit to offer that your parents can focus on their medical care while you help out with the small task of transportation. This can be a way for you to ease your parents into accepting transportation help in the future.
In addition to an address, if your parents have limited mobility then you’ll want to confirm the building entrance, clinic floor, appointment time, and expected length. If they are being picked up by a third party, find out where they will wait for the return trip. Ask the care team whether a companion must remain during the visit to take your parent home, especially after sedation, anesthesia, or a procedure. Do not assume a taxi or rideshare will meet discharge requirements.
Of course great-grandma will be at the wedding! But at what cost?
When was the last time she flew on a plane? Can she use her rollator on the grass? Will she be able to hear what is said? Who will step away from the day’s activities to support her if she needs a break?
You may find yourself caught between roles as Mother of the Bride and Daughter of the Elderly. This is not a position where you want to compromise. The same holds true for graduations, baby showers, and other milestone family events: the activities that are most important to you are also where you most want your parents to attend and you are least positioned to drop everything to help them. The best thing you can do in these cases is to have a designated backup from outside the family. Your neighbor or another friend who is not part of your family activity is good to call in for help with your parents.
Build your trip’s plan around your parents’ energy. A nearby drop-off, reserved seat, short route to a restroom, and permission to leave before the crowd can help preserve their daily steps. If your parent is eligible for ADA paratransit at home they may be able to use visitor service in another transit system for a limited period with advance arrangements.
If you’re going to a large venue, like for a college graduation, long walks and heat can exhaust your parent. Large venues often have information posted online about accessible parking, passenger drop-off zones, elevators, and wheelchair seating. Request accommodations early and keep the confirmation with the tickets.
The easiest and fastest transportation is a taxi or rideshare. If your parents have minimal physical and mental health limitations, and they can afford the high prices of these services, the convenience is great. Your parents can contact these services directly or use Go Go Grandparent for a low tech
Local paratransit is a better option for your parents if they have limited mobility or if the cost of private transportation is too much. It will take several months to apply and be approved for paratransit but it can be a low-cost and high-convenience option. In Palm Beach County, Florida, Palm Tran Connections partners with Lyft to provide door-to-door service for eligible customers at just $4 per ride.
Options vary widely by location. Start with the local public transit agency, Area Agency on Aging, senior center, hospital or clinic, faith community, and volunteer driver programs. The federal Eldercare Locator can connect older adults and families with local transportation resources at 800-677-1116 or online.
ADA complementary paratransit serves eligible people whose disability prevents them from using fixed-route transit for some or all trips. Eligibility is based on the person's functional ability to use the local system, not age or diagnosis alone, and applications take time. Ask the local transit agency about eligibility, service boundaries, booking windows, fares, companions, personal care attendants, and return-ride rules.
Transportation failures happen: appointments run late, ceremonies change entrances, and return rides arrive early. Put a second driver or provider on the plan, keep phones charged, and make sure the older adult has identification, essential medication, water if appropriate, and contact information. Share only the health information the driver truly needs.
If a flight is part of the journey, arrange wheelchair or mobility assistance directly with the airline. TSA Cares can answer screening questions and coordinate checkpoint support for travelers with disabilities or medical conditions when contacted at least 72 hours before departure.
Identify transportation needs.
This page offers general transportation planning information, not medical advice. Ask the care team what level of transportation and supervision is appropriate after a procedure or when a health condition affects transfers, sitting, oxygen, or infection risk. An occupational therapist, physical therapist, social worker, or mobility specialist can help when entering a vehicle or traveling safely has become difficult. Call 911 for an emergency rather than using scheduled transportation.